锘?It’s not all about You!" While this phrase is often hurled with venom, intending to hurt someone, actually the truth in this statement can also be immensely healing.
Over the course of my life, I have had many events that were personally "hurtful" to me, that when I was able to view them later through a different lens,
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Situations from my past that I previously "took personally" (paternal abandonment, an abusive relationship) became much easier to understand and heal once I realized that I was attributing meanings to others that were unnecessary and not there. When we believe that people are doing things "to" us, we are taking on too much and only hurt ourselves.
When people around us,
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It’s when we fail to see that people are simply doing things to try to meet their own needs without wrapping ourselves up in attributing meanings to a person or making assumptions that their motives are about US that we mistakenly take on too much.
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Because these situations are complex,
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Sometimes,
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Although his actions had an effect on our family (and on my mother much more than myself),
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In fact, he did things to try to help us and mitigate the influence his actions had.
Now, do I agree with the strategies he used to try and get his needs met? Well,
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And I can also see that there are strategies many of us use including me! that don’t always get us the outcome we want
How many experiences and events in our lives could we learn to see from a different vantage point if we realized it was not "all about us"?
The theme of "Don’t take it personally" is not to suggest that you have a lack of feeling. Rather,
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This can help you to start healing,
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Following up on the theme from last month,
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I hope that our discussions will be helpful to you,
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