Flight attendants read the safety instructions and hand out snacks, then they say goodbye to people as they leave the plane. Hell, airlines don’t even need to hire people for this job couldn’t passengers just take turns doing that shit?

Otherwise, it’s all about traveling around the world, yet never having to sit still for hours at a time. Flight attendants get to meet all kinds of exciting people and get on the plane before all the other assholes. It’s like being on vacation all year round, only they get paid.

You may not realize it, but flight attendants are basically the airplane equivalent of those rhesus monkeys NASA used to launch into space. As they take your crap with big, fake smiles on their faces, you
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"We figure we’ve got around a 30 percent shot at getting superpowers."

Honestly, how many of you have a job so crappy that scientists study you to determine the experimental mystery diseases you might catch just by showing up for work? And to be clear, this isn’t just a preventative measure in case
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As for how the job affected their mental health, on a scale of 1 to 12 (with 1 being "I’m cool" and 12 being "You probably had to slide this test under the door of my padded cell"), most ended up with a score of 6 or higher. In total, 17 percent of
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Then there’s the being away from home part. If flight attendants
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"Each day I picture myself strangling all of you with this."

And, of course, if we’re going to talk about flying, we have to mention terrorism. (It’s a law. Listen carefully next time you see Starscream on The Transformers.) Nowadays, flight attendants have to be trained to spot suspicious activity and, in case shit gets real, they have to know self defense as well. Plus, if someone gets sick or hurt, they have to be fully trained in first aid and CPR. How much is a free flight to Barbados once a year worth to you?

Then there’s the everyday stuff. Like everyone else who works in customer service, flight attendants have to put up with dickheads, some of whom will apparently do things like kick them if
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"Sir, I’m gonna need to see your balls right now. Both of
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Professional wrestling is a contact sport with no contact a sissy slap fight with nonsensical story lines and amateur acting. It’s more dancing than fighting, elaborate moves that are designed only to look cool while missing the opponent completely. And
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Next time, just order a McFlurry and move on.

They die early. And we mean there’s a really good chance a professional wrestler will die before 50.

First, try willingly
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Take the daily grind, for one. As recently as the late ’90s, it was not uncommon for wrestlers to be on the road 300+ days a year and to go months between days off. Today, things have softened, and full time wrestlers are only on the road about 250 days a year. Babies.

This rushed and unrelenting travel schedule can
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This guy takes up two full seats. In first class.

If they survive the brutal travel schedule, there’s a good chance professional wrestlers will end up crippled or dead. Drug use has always been rampant in wrestling, as it’s the only way
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"Your theory was correct, Jim it’s pretty hot."

Then there’s the brain. Taking a steel chair to the cranium happens all the time in wrestling and yes, they are making contact and many moves involve wrestlers being dumped on their necks and heads. Concussions are commonplace and, unlike in the NFL, the show does not grind to a screeching halt if somebody gets hurt midmatch. Brock Lesnar reports not being able to remember the ending to his WrestleMania match with Kurt Angle, as he
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"Wait, did I win, or is my face being overly assed?"

Chris Nowinski suffered over a half
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They’re furry cheerleaders who don’t look nearly as good in a skirt. Mascots are seen largely as silly entertainment for the kids, who just love to watch grown men dressed as various anthropomorphic creatures doing the Pee wee Herman big shoe dance because the home
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And soul scarring forefathers who have just escaped hell.

You probably wouldn’t last one minute inside that suit. To be a mascot, you need to be able to withstand working conditions so bad that the local elephant masturbator might send you a sympathy card. For one thing, that cute little costume you’d be wearing? It can weigh anywhere from 20 to 30 pounds, far more if it rains, and that doesn’t include the big ass head. Lugging around the giant Mr. Mets head day in and day out could quickly snap your neck if you don’t keep it in shape.

And even with a fan inside,
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